Friday 23 August 2013

Guest Post Melodie Campbell


COMEDY WRITER FALLS RIGHT OVER CLIFF



Ever make a really bad typo?  
I mean really bad. 

My worst ever professional mistake was in an Annual Report for a one-hundred-million dollar corporation, in which an innocent little ‘t’ went missing from the word ‘assets.’  The board was not amused by “This year, we experienced an increase in corporate asses.”

Today, I found out what one little vowel can do to ROWENA AND THE DARK LORD, book 2 in the comic fantasy Land’s End series.

Okay, REALLY uncool when you misspell the name of your own book on your own blog.

ROWENA AND THE DARK LARD is probably not the best way to get sales for a fantasy series. However, as I do write comedy, I'm thinking about a parody.

Is it okay to write a parody of your own book?

Draft one: ROWENA AND THE DARK LARD
Synopsis 1: Rowena moves back to Land’s End and opens up a bakery.
Synopsis 2: Cedric’s use of dark magic goes totally out of control, and so does his appetite.
Synopsis 3: Thane and Rowena return to Land’s End and become pig farmers.
Synopsis 4: Rowena messes up another spell that causes all who look at her to turn into donuts.
Synopsis 5: Rowena kills off Nigella Lawson in a battle with pastry rollers, and assumes the role of Prime Time Network Food Goddess <sic>.
Synopsis 6: Someone takes a totally justified whack at the author. End of series.

Excerpt from 
ROWENA AND THE DARK LORD

Men’s voices again, echoing like souls lost in a fog. The mist lifted in one swift movement to disappear into nothingness. In its place, were at least a hundred men.
Bugger! I messed up.
“Houston, we have a problem,” I said out loud. This wasn’t supposed to happen. I must have pronounced one of the spell words wrong.
“Who is Houston?” Lars said.
“Romans!” Gareth hissed. He drew his sword.
“Romans?” I stared at the battle-scarred men before us. They looked exhausted. They also looked bloody, dirty and rather short. Not to mention confused.
How the heck could they be Romans?
Someone yelled “Form Square!” in—yup—that was Latin.
“What the hell?” I stared. The men came to life moving with purpose into a square. Within seconds we were facing a shield wall bristling with spears.
The man on horseback stared at me. No stirrups on his saddle. A helmet that was in history books. Definitely Roman. I stared back at him.
Romans? In this time? What the poop had I done?
“It’s a freaking temporal rift!” My laugh was strident. “Where the hell is Spock when you need him?

Rowena Through the Wall is the
first book in the Land's End Series.
Melodie Campbell achieved a personal best this year when Library Journal compared her to Janet Evanovich.  She has over 200 publications, including 100 comedy credits, 40 short stories, and 4 novels. She has won 6 awards for fiction

ROWENA AND THE DARK LORD Buy Link:
And the one that started it all: ROWENA THROUGH THE WALL, book 1 in the Land’s End series




A Writer's Journey

WELCOME

I'm happy to have two new posts for this issue of A Writer's Journey. Above, funny lady Melodie Campbell, gives her take on those author typos that plague us all. Melodie is the author of the Lands End series, a humorous spoof on the bodice ripper novels of yesteryear. If you need a chuckle for a lazy afternoon, check out her books through the links below. I thoroughly enjoyed Rowena Through the Wall, the first book in the series. I have the new titles on my Kobo for later enjoyment. The series follows Rowena's adventures as she is catapulted back into history. Definitely a bodice-ripper that redefines the term. Plus, check out Melodie's The Goddaugher.

And I managed to persuade my friend and favorite cat lady, Lynne Ware, to write a column for this issue of Catamania. Lynne and her TNR buddy, Beth, are the local cat-nabbing gurus. Of course, it's all in a good cause, even when you have to get down and dirty to round up feral cats so they can be spayed or neutered and returned to their colonies. Lynne has found herself in a number of interesting positions as she tries to capture feisty cats and kittens.

MEA CULPA: As for the new chapter of Candle Without A Flame, my apologies, it is on hold. Chapter Three will be published in the September issue of A Writer's Journey. What's the problem? Apart from stressing out, I am in the middle of chaos--getting ready for a move from a house into an apartment. I have moved many times in my life so should be used to it, but perhaps age is catching up with me. The effort of downsizing, filling a trillion boxes with stuff to give away and others to take, and trying to do too many things at once, was impossible. So I had to give precedence to the move and put my muse on hold. I promise I will be back on track as soon as possible. I have left Chapter Two below for new readers, Of course, all chapters so far are in the archives on the sidebar. Meanwhile enjoy Catamania and Melodie's guest post.